Just plain wrong.
She only says the number 2, she farts and blames other people, and there are days she eats only things that come from Trader Joe's that include nothing green. Oh, and I don't ever shop at Whole Foods but I like people to think I do so they think I buy meat that won't give my kid some health problems but we really buy what's on sale at the grocery store.
Jay tries to remind me that she will end up fine.
He reminds me that we decided our number one goal as parents was to raise a humble kid. (Is farting and blaming it on someone else humble? I don't know what category that falls under!)
Humble is what we came from.
Humble is what our culture taught us.
In our home, humble and loving is what matter.
But outside those walls is feeling mighty scary lately. I live my life through the lens of teenagers. I know what is ahead for her.
Then today I got the wake up call I needed. It started with a grand idea for our trip back home, a joint birthday party for myself (okay, real humble Em) and my cousin Becky. We've been doing it since I was pre-pubescent. Is started remembering the parties we've had. Becky is 7 years (-7 days) older than I am.
We had a pool party with root beer in bottles.
We had a party when she was in college where I got cool teenage stuff and she had just moved into her first place and got dishes (she was totes pissed about getting practical gifts and it was hilarious).
And then I just started to cry.
What 20 year old wants to have a birthday party with a 13 year old?
The same one who took me to the beach every Sunday after church in my awkward fat kid one piece while she was adorable and cute and her bikini and introduced me to all her friends (even the cute lifeguard) and was never ever ashamed of me.
The girl who let me meet her smokin' hot new boyfriend (who she ended up marrying and making cute babies with) to make sure I liked him before he met our family.
That's how I became a well-adjusted (mostly) adult.
It was not organic produce
or a fancy preschool
or baby sign language
it was the people God decided needed to be in my life.
I don't remember a lot of crap I learned in college.
I don't remember ANYTHING I learned in preschool but I do remember outside play including sitting on a big block of ice to make it melt so I feel like I'm pretty on track with AG's education.
I do remember the lessons that people taught me, like how Becky always made me feel worthy and important and honored no matter my age. Also, how our family indulged us in having so many birthday parties with gifts when we were probably far too old for such things.
So chances are I am going to totally screw up my kid.
We are saving for therapy and not college because we feel like the therapy will come first anyway
But...
I hope there are lots of Beckys.
To know how to be truly humble you have to watch someone be it for you first. To lay aside all that the world says is the right order and choose a different order that allows another to feel unconditional love.
I have received that a million times over and still never grocery shopped at Whole Foods so there is hope for my offspring.
